3 disc set; 6 hours of inspiration, motivation. Buy Now

I know you’re dying to know what made me do this right? True story, I was telling someone about the impact that my book was having with people. My listener was all into it, I KNEW I had a sale. I offered to sell him a book and this person looked me up and down like I just farted and said “Man, I don’t have time to read! What’s wrong with you? I’m too busy.” Being quick witted like I’m playing The Dozens I said “If I had an audio version would you buy it?” He said “Yes! I’m in my car traveling to different cities almost every week.” It was a no-brainer!

Information intake is changing. People don’t want books as much anymore but they still want information. Content is king, just ask the people at YouTube! I have a friend who learned how to change his garbage disposal, it wasn’t with the manual, it was by watching an eight minute video by a plumber. Some people still learn by reading and taking notes, some by hands on, but the most effective way is now by hearing or seeing; just ask the creators of Flocabulary.

Another great thing about the Audio version of Connect and Grow Rich is that you can hear how passionate I am about connecting you with your success. Sometimes words on a page just can’t give you that emotion and that feeling. Imagine trying to feel Michael Jackson’s emotion on the song “Wanna Be Startin’ Somethin’” or “Bad” by reading the lyrics. It can’t be done. There’s a difference between hearing Dr. Martin Luther King’s “I Have a Dream” speech and reading it. What about the impact of JFK saying “Ask not what your country can do for you, but ask what you can do for your country!” Through the audio version I’ve been able to connect to you the listener so much so that when the book is done playing I’ll be waiting by my iPhone for a call from you.

This post isn’t to just pitch you on a new product. I’m not just trying to get your money. My BIG objective is to strip you of a reason NOT to Connect and Grow Rich! For as many books that have been sold, many haven’t because reading isn’t always the best way for many to absorb information.

I’ve made it really easy for you, the only way I can make it any easier is to spend a week at your house! If I can’t get you to turn off ESPN Radio for a few hours to help you live the life of your dreams then I guess being a master connector is not in your future. But you’re not like that at all, no, not you.

My friend Rance Rob has a saying “With action comes faith.” You won’t know what you are able to accomplish without taking action and you’ll never believe in yourself until you “DO” something. Let’s be real, too many people suffer from “The Secret-itis” you know, where you think it to happen. I know more talented and uber-smart connection impoverished people still THINKING while my less talented friends are connection rich (and some also financially well off) because they think and act. You can read or hear “Connect and Grow Rich” a million times and be able to recite it word for word but it will profit nothing until you DO something.

You actually have to engage with other people, give value to them, stay in touch.  You can’t just read my book, or listen to my audio set, and become rich.  You will only succeed when you put these principles into action.

So that’s my message for today.  Learn all you can, but don’t stop there.  Apply what you learn.  Have you reached out and connected to me yet?  You can find me on Facebook and Twitter and LinkedIn. What about all those other people who you think can help you?  Have you reached out?  What steps have you taken TODAY to move you closer to your dreams? Do not go to bed tonight until you’ve done something to connect with another person.  Taking action, actually “Doing” something, is the only way to true success.

ORDER YOUR BOOK, AUDIO, OR COMBO TODAY!!

I’m in my own world driving down the street. The day is nice, and on the Old School radio station in my city they play “Thin Line Between Love and Hate” by The Persuaders. Immediately I sing along in a falsetto that you couldn’t rival in your dreams.   I glance to my left and get the “crazy” stare from a beautiful lady, her toddler, and her dog. I was into it too much. As I gathered myself and listened to the song I realized something. There’s a thin line between business Networking and NOTWorking.

I want to take the time to give you some keys pointers on how to connect in climates that allow you to network but people may not be in a networking state of mind. This is the silent assassin to building successful relationships: you’re “networking” your mark while they’re “not working.” I could have added a spot for building at “business networking events” but everyone there is in that frame of mind already. If you ever want to get to befriend power players, don’t always try to when their power suits are neatly pressed, cuff links are perfectly in place, and their hi-beams are on. Use those times when neckties are loosened and hair is let down to bust open the doors. I hear these questions all the time; Rob, can you tell me…

Can I try business Networking at a social event?

The Key word here is Social. Most people don’t come to social events to do or even talk about business.The best thing to do is make regular conversation the way you would in any social setting and try to make a FRIEND! “All things being equal people want to do business with friends. All things being not so equal, people STILL want to do business with their friends.” – Jeffrey Gitomer

Remember when talking in this setting to ask questions using the Power of F.O.R.M.: Family, Occupation, Recreation and Motivation. Don’t just ask them about what they do! Most people are trying to get away from work so don’t bring it to a social event. That’s like trying to talk Happy Meals with a McDonald’s manager at a nightclub. Find out what they like doing in their free time or maybe what is a trip they want to take this year.

In my experience I have found the highest-level people carry no cards. So what does that mean? Don’t offer yours… Take their cell number or email down and immediately connect with them on all the social media networks after you get home.

How-to-Network Power Play: Don’t drink too many drinks if you are still trying to “network.”

How do I Network with a Coworker?

If you’ve ever read the book Acres of Diamonds by Russell Conwell, then you know that some of the finest gemstones are in your own backyard. In any business environment, most people only know their coworkers superficially and don’t take the time to get to know them on an intellectual basis. Try taking fifteen minutes a day and get to know someone at work a little bit better. If you find something in common– similar high school, hometown, or childhood activity your depth of connection will immediately go up 1,000 percent. If you only network with one person a week, next year you’ll have fifty new connections, which you have something in common with!

Also, never think that there are certain levels of employees that you should only build co-worker connections with. Never look down on the mail clerk or janitor, you never know who they may find favor with within the company.   Always remember that some of your most important connections come in the most mysterious ways. You could be talking to a mail clerk that is the son/daughter of the company VP. They may run that company one day and you established that important connection before everyone else. On the flip side maybe you have a side passion like music. Your connection to a co-worker could lead you to a famous producer. It happens.

How-to-Network Power Play: Connect with your fellow co-workers on Facebook so you can get to know their personal and family side.

How do I network with INFLUENTIAL PEOPLE?

The big fish, everybody dreams of saying they’ve networked with (insert your dream connection.) Connecting with big wigs are one of the best things you can do to build momentum in your business. What celebrities, athletes, and business power players carry with them is influence. People are most likely to follow people that are influential and have a great track record.

Here are 3 important things to remember:

1. They put their pants on the same way as you! My mentor told me to never look up to anybody of influence… he said you look at them straight in the eye. They are no different then you.

How-to-Network Power Play: Stop acting like they are a foreign creature! The influential person will notice and appreciate this also. That’s how you will stand out to them.

2. When you meet influential people for the first time, you better have something powerful to ask or something powerful to say or you will have blown the opportunity. Read down this blog to find 8 powerful questions. Remember to go slow and have something for them that they perceive to be valuable! In my experience, I found out the slower you go the more likely you are to maintain a great connection.

3. Have a way to add value after the meeting. During the conversation you should have at least 3 ways to add value to what this influential person does! Reference my book for the many other ways to become Remarkable instead of invisible. How can I help you… and with no motive is one of the best ways to not only to make a connection but keep it!

Always remember this! People can smell “What’s In It For Me” like bad cologne on an Italian wise guy so try not to network while wearing this fragrance. The next thing for you to do is go, connect, and build! ]]> http://www.connectionaire.com/2010/05/networking-and-not-working-the-only-difference-is-one-letter/feed/ 5 http://www.connectionaire.com/2010/04/i%e2%80%99ve-cheated-more-than-tiger-woods-now-i-have-to-answer-to-her/ http://www.connectionaire.com/2010/04/i%e2%80%99ve-cheated-more-than-tiger-woods-now-i-have-to-answer-to-her/#comments Mon, 26 Apr 2010 20:29:27 +0000 RobCoats http://www.connectionaire.com/?p=289

BEFORE YOU GO ANY FURTHER WATCH THIS VIDEO:

CRAP! I Think I’m Tiger Woods!

Tiger did it. He did it A LOT! So many women put him on Front Street that it wasn’t funny. If I would have been given the chance to get some money I would have went on Access Hollywood myself and took some shots! Truthfully in all seriousness Tiger was in trouble way before that faithful Thanksgiving night in 2009 and I could tell what the problem was immediately…he lost his accountability. He lost his way. In 2006 Tiger lost his accountability partner, his father, Earl Woods. The next thing you know Tiger was having his own personal FreekNiK with all sorts of women.

While everyone was busy judging Mr. Woods, I had to step back and look at myself. I too can be Tiger Woods. I AM TIGER WOODS! You are too! No, there aren’t Perkins waitresses and Las Vegas party promoters in my bedroom that causes me to be comparable. But I too have committed infidelity quite a bit…on my dreams, goals, and aspirations. Many times I’ve made a to-do-list only to step out on it with something else. (Don’t judge me, you too have committed Success Adultery!) My lack of accountability started to close in on me and my future success came at me swinging a Titleist 9 Iron! When the medics arrived it was quite a wake-up call.

My dreams, goals, and aspirations are Elin Woods and I needed to find a “Sex Rehab” so to speak. So I found what is called an Accountability Partner. Accountability Partners are so important because they don’t let you resort back to the old you. You don’t need someone who is there to just keep you in check and be someone that you tell your biggest and darkest secrets to. You need someone who is always going to be encouraging you to be better and reach the goals that you set for yourself.

I Need One of These

How the heck do I find an Accountability Partner? I’m glad you asked. Finding someone to keep you accountable is as important as marrying the right spouse. The chemistry can either be as magical as Puffy and Ma$e or Cliff & Claire Huxtable or as toxic as Terrell Owens and any team that he has played for since he left the 49ers.

I’m going to let you in on my “Accountability Partner” world. My AP is Shanel Cooper Sykes, a successful New Yorker that is relentless in her pursuit to make me better. It’s not always sexy. It doesn’t always look like Paula Patton in a gorgeous red carpet gown. Sometimes it can be downright Mo’Nique in “Precious” (okay a little extreme but you get the point.) Sometimes necessary outweighs sexy and it’s for the BEST. My AP is important to my success and my growth. I call her my Success Wife! She makes me take out the garbage, do chores, and talks to me while the game is on (read: keeps me focused.) Here’s how:

• Having an AP in Shanel Cooper Sykes has been amazing because before I even had an idea to write my book she already finished hers. She had already took the time and went through the whole process so that helped me with making less errors because she had already done it. She also had been successful at selling thousands of copies online. She sold a lot of copies so that let me know that it was possible to do.
• My Success Wife kept me focused on finishing the book because I am a idea-holic at times. I am an aries (don’t know if that matters) and when I get an inspired thought or Aha! moment, I will instantly move on to the next new project and not spend as many hours being patient so I can let the first idea come to fruition. Many times I said “what about if I open a chain of barber shops or start doing my “Connect Your Life” events” and she would say STOP! Promote your book now Rob now that youre finished. Put a link in your status updates that lets people buy. Do a teleseminar etc…
• My AP is always there to let me know when I’m going against the image or brand that I’m portraying. Many times she’s corrected me when I’m posting things on a break up or a meaningless quote or song and she will say “Rob, what are you doing!” Post something about your Book! People don’t care about what you just ate. Give them value! Let them know why Connecting is important. Many times she has went as far as posting things on actual post that say “Rob! You just don’t get it! Smh!” and this is open for all my friends and fans to see! You need someone who is bold like that who will pimp slap you to Success and embarress you if they have to!
• “What are you doing” WW_D? Knowing who you want to model is key. What keeps Shanel focused on her empire is always thinking What Would Oprah Do? Before she posts any statement she clearly thinks about it. That keeps her brand tight. Finding someone you look up to and studying their post and seeing what they do to grow their success will help you immensely when building your brand online and in person.
• She keeps me humble. All my social media friends can be telling me how much of a great job I’m doing but she will make me look at reality and say “so how much have you made off of people “liking” your status updates? Her job isn’t to make me feel good… It’s to make me rich and by giving me the honest truth day in and day out whether I like it or not is definitely rare. .
• My AP never lets me get comfortable with present or past successes…. A quote I always remember is “fame is a vapor, popularity an accident.” John Hagee, a famous TV pastor says, “Success brings stagnation, and with stagnation comes death.” Always be in creation mode.
• Choosing an AP for each field in your life where you need improvement will also help you on your journey. The only thing that seperates me from most people is knowing that I don’t know everything and I can’t do it all myself. I have AP’s in speaking, in writing, in fitness, and spiritual. Every single one of them are are better than me in their chosen field of expertise. Every single one! Lets take speaking for example. Now that I’m finished with my book the way to get it out to more people is to share it in person. For that I will have to start tailoring powerful messages. Now the reality is I haven’t done public speaking for months but now that I have a powerful publicist I have to have a polished speech. For that I called my friends Shaun Derik, Javier Sanchez and Chris Davis. These individuals have been speaking full time for several years. Why not call them and get their expertise and get the best possible plan in the shortest amount of time so I can kill the speaking game! I borrow their experiences and they give me secrets so I don’t have to waste time making mistakes on my own.
• Pick up your phone and answer your emails. At times when I get off course I don’t want to speak to my AP’s because I know I’m not doing what I should do but that doesn’t do anything but slow me down. Running or hiding from a situation doesn’t help you. Be up front and take your whoopon like a man! In the end you will thank them greatly for it!
• Having someone keep you straight and on pace is a big deal! It’s a big deal for both parties. It’s the person that is keeping you on pace with your small goals so that when you look up a year from now and see how much farther you’ve gone it will blow your mind.
•  It’s easy to say what you’re going to do. It’s easy to write them down on paper or put them in the notes section of your “Droid, iPhone, or Blackberry; it’s another thing to look your AP in the face and try to explain why you didn’t get it done but you really had no excuse that is worthy enough. That’s what Tiger had to feel like while telling Elin why he couldn’t get those vows done. I’m done cheating on my dreams, goals, and aspirations. That is the feeling my Accountability Partner helps me avoid every time we meet.

My advice to you is to get one…NOW!

If you have an accountability partner, how do you make sure that you both get the most from the relationship?

Please Leave a Comment and Let me know you’re alive!!

This year, I’m going to do this, this year I’m going to do that, this year I’m going to make some real money!  Blah, Blah, Blah! That’s how it starts. Every year, you resolve to be different. The problem with resolutions though, is that they are tradition and command no real commitment!! They are often misdirected & they seldom involve any change of the one  important thing… and that’s YOU!!

 Now there’s nothing wrong with making resolutions but we must remember we have to create an action plan that will make your resolve stronger. I don’t understand how people think just by going into a new year that everything will change when they still have the same tired, broke busted and disgusted mentality! Here are  3  resolutions to remember in 2010 that will help you achieve the goals that most people only dream about.

Resolution 1: I WILL “be” the change that I seek

You want the change that Obama promised you? The truth is that you have to create it. And that begins with changing your frame of mind. Everything visible manifests first in the invisible. The intangible makes the tangible.

 Resolution 2: I WILL “stop” treating people like transactions

 The worst thing you can do is to treat people like transactions. Do you ever wonder why people don’t seem to respond to your phone calls or emails? Most likely it’s because you only contact them when you need something. No one wants to be a part of a single sided relationship.

 Resolution 3: I WILL “give” value first

 Make it a point to help someone else! But here’s the kicker…don’t ask for anything in return. Think I’m crazy? There is something called the law of reciprocation that begins to work in your favor. Having a mindset like this will help you gain valuable allies that are the key to your success.

 Ok so now that you have the mindset covered, we can work on building your network!

 5 Secrets to building a Spartans type network

1.      Be a Friend- Jeffrey Gitomer says it best in his quote “All things being created equal people want to do business with their friends.” Instead of buiding more customers build more friends and watch your business sky rocket!

2.      Be Strategic- Do your research and create a plan. Find out things like what they are passionate about and give them ideas, resources you’re your connections if it will help them fulfill it.

3.      Be Patient- Wise people know that it takes time to establish trust. You have to be honest and consistent for a while… sometimes 6 months or even a year to get most influential people to trust you.

4.      Add Value First- Find ways to solve problems for people in your network. Be the problem solver and overtime you will become a connection that your colleagues can’t afford not to know.

5.      Follow up- The fortune is in the follow up. Be consistent and focus on building a long lasting friendship and overtime you will reap big rewards.

 Three Advantages of Building Your Network Like this:

• Private Information- this is key in most business transactions. Having a connection on the inside can only help you get to your goal faster.
• Access to Diverse Skill Sets- People you network with can bring a variety of         knowledge and information to the table. It’s like a Thanksgiving buffet of information!
• Access to Power- The people you have access to will open doors you didn’t even know existed!

This blog is my present to you for 2010 to read this meditate on this for the rest of the year and really try to internalize this message! I guarantee you will thank me later.

Leave me a Comment and Let me know your ALIVE out there!

A lot of people will look at this headline and think I’m crazy for writing this. Well, you’re probably right, I am crazy. But my writing is a product of my experiences and I guarantee you that by the time you finish reading this blog you will certainly feel me.

 I try to make myself as transparent as I can for you all because I feel that it is more important that we connect on a real level instead of me coming off as some esoteric and illusive, super human being. I go through the same things that everyone else goes through; the only difference is that I’ve found a larger platform on which to channel it. And that’s by writing it down and sharing it with the world.

Growing up I had 4 other siblings and two very hard working parents, so they didn’t always have the time (or make the time) to take me to the barbershop. You should also know that when I was young I was not a very confident kid. I had acne and braces and wore second hand clothing. My mother would go to the thrift store to find old clothes that had brand labels and cut them out and put them on my Kmart jeans! My mother, bless her heart, had such wonderful intentions… lol! So with that culmination of circumstances against me, I felt that I at least I should be able to get a good haircut! Haircuts were so few and far between that my mother eventually took it upon herself to cut me and my little brother’s hair. Not so much the experienced barber, she gave us our edge ups the only way she knew how. Can you say “Chili bowl”?! She would take a small plastic bowl, place it on my head and cut around it! Go ahead and laugh, I know you probably are anyways, but this was a lot of stress on somebody that was just going through puberty. I decided to take a page from Tyler Perry, unbeknownst to him at the time, and adopted the philosophy “I can do bad all by myself” (he may owe me some royalties for that one). I took the clippers and tried to give myself a fade, but it was so bad I ended up just cutting it all off.  My next haircut = bald, next haircut = bald again! My first 10 to 20 attempts were pretty bad, but I soon would get better. Before long my brother let me practice my craft on his head, then my nephews, and then my best friends. By the time I got to high school I was really good. I was even cutting my teacher’s hair! By the time I was 15  I was running a pretty lucrative operation.

So what is the moral of the story? Every trial is an opportunity for advancement. Through what looked like a disadvantage, was instead able to create an advantage! I had discovered for myself a trade that I now could take anywhere and use to make myself a profit. I used cutting hair to propel myself through college and also as a jumping point that led to other opportunities that made me even more money. Being a barber was my first step to becoming a connectionaire. As a barber it was imperative that I was able to build trust and cement relationships. The majority of a barbers ability to create longevity stems from creating repeat business. And if you’re good they will come back atleast every two weeks. Over time when your clients really feel like they know you, they begin to place value in you and will give you access to information that they would only tell their best friends or those in their immediate circles!

 So what are the key points to take away from this story?

• Count Your Blessings- If something looks bleak in the present it doesn’t mean it’s going to stay like that. Usually, your misfortunes wind up being what makes you your fortune. Your charge is to analyze the negative and find the positive.
• Build Trust- Over time, being consistent and adding value first will pay off. Give people the opportunity to trust you and then once you have it, you will have access to information and opportunities that you may not have know existed.
• It’s a marathon- There is no such thing as overnight success. Anything that appears to have happened suddenly, most likely has taken 5-10 years to pay off.

 Little did I know that having to cut my own hair would save me thousands of dollars over the course of the last 14 years, and would lead to me making tens of thousands more. You see, lacking money makes you look to your remaining resources. This also explains why people at the “bottom” are “hungrier” and approach a project with more tenacity. When you are able to look at your disadvantages and turn them into your advantages, you truly realize the power of having no money!

If you have made it this far the least you can do is let me know that your alive and LEAVE A COMMENT!

Your visual presentation is important! In the initial stages of connecting the first thing that is observed is your wrapping. All of your talent, skills, etc are inside of the package. First impressions are how you get your foot in the door. The way that you look, speak and carry yourself really sticks with people. What are you presenting? What impressions are you making? 

John Molloy, the author of “Dress for Success, writes that 90% of how you present yourself is visual. Your appearance and demeanor communicate who you are, your level of self-assurance, and your ability to interact. 

The way that you present yourself determines whether people will be drawn to you or want to run from you. As much as I try my hardest not to judge people by how they present themselves, I do. We all do. It is very important to me because it tells me a little bit about the person. I tell myself if it’s not important for them to look like business people, I’m not certain that they’ll take my business seriously. Make sure that you know your stuff if you make the mistake of not dressing like the great person that you are. When you open your mouth, you should be so knowledgeable and articulate that they forget what you’re wearing.  

Zora Neal Hurston once described character saying, “He walked like he knew where he was going.” You must be confident and be aware of yourself, your target audience and your surroundings. Self-awareness is a must if you want to become an effective connector.

 Check me out on facebook and you can see even more pictures of me dressing to impress! LOL. Post a comment in the box below and let me know if you agree!

I know that it is all relative but if you if you want to get money, then dress like money, walk like money and talk like money! 

I’m dressed like a couple million bucks. How about you?

“Leap and the net will appear. There will be a thousand unseen bands waiting just for you.” –Joseph Campbell

I was recently cutting the hair of a friend who is a sophomore in college at Ohio State University and he was very troubled about networking. Now here’s a guy that had made over $100k at the age of 16 by doing computer consulting for companies, so by no means does he lack intelligence. His challenge, however, was his social skills. He told me that he didn’t feel like he had interpersonal skills because he was either on the computer 8 hours a day, or studying for the 23 credit hours that he was taking this semester. He told me he found it hard to keep conversations going past the “Hi my name is ____ and I’m a student at Ohio State” point.

 His dilemma is very common for most people in society today but is very simple to master. If you want to become effective with communication just master the art of asking the right questions.

 The best opening questions are those that encourage people to speak about themselves, or their work, passions, family, or experiences. Remember people love talking about themselves. Making the conversation about them in the very beginning lets you see what kind of person they are and also can help you to find some common ground

 Here are 8 great questions to build rapport in social or business settings:

• As the owner of a business, what do you find to be the two or three greatest challenges you face?
• How do you relieve the stress of your work?
• How did you get into your line of work?
• Who are your role models?
• When did you decide on this career path?
• How has your year been?
• What is your goal for next year?
• Where would you most like to live and work?

 So with this being said if want to know how to keep the conversation flowing MEMORIZE these questions. Don’t just glance at these and take notes but make it a conscious decision to know these like you know the back of your hand. I guarantee these will get you past the quiet awkward moments. Lastly, remember to be “Yourself.” You never know if the person on the other end has had (or is having) the very same conflicts you have!

 Please comment, tweet or digg this if you got something out of this! Thank you!

I need to be honest with you. Rob Coats wasn’t always the so-called Connectionaire. At best, I was a “financiaholic” (dubbed by my intern).

At 21, like many college students, I wasn’t focused on getting a degree and getting a good paying job. I was focused on breaking the statistic of being a “broke college student”.

I started off with a talent I learned at 12 years old- cutting hair. It took, like anything, 3 years to build a clientele. I was making almost $150/day cutting hair. I had almost no expenses. A high-school connection led me into a direct-sales marketing phenomena. I went from earning great money cutting hair to an impressive $5,000/month while still remaining on Wright State’s dean list.

One day, while talking to my professor about my businesses, he asked what I was doing still in school. He pointed out: “You are one of those people that will be successful with or without college.”

His affirmation of what I had already been thinking led me to my decision. I finished out that semester, and withdrew from the University. Now that my attention was solely on direct-sales, my income increased, some months topping $15,000. By 23 I was making well over 6 figures.

The chase for money cost me many relationships; life-long friends and family. Like many business ventures, the company downsized and my paycheck soon followed. Now I was out an elaborate lifestyle, and a support system.

I moved back into “the low-level suite” (my parent’s basement), and took 6-8 months to focus on the internal rather than the external: I reflected, read, and studied. I needed to overcome this defeat, as well as better prepare myself for life’s next hurdle. This time, I was going to be prepared. And, I was going to chase after my passion, not my paycheck.

My next attempt was in Real Estate. Although I had been conquered before, I did not give up on my passion for self-employment. Through real estate I built connectionships/relationships with many people and re-sparked my love of connecting. I began things like philanthropy projects that were of no monetary benefit, but more importantly, helped others in need.

Realizing that not everyone shares the people-skills I have, I began nationwide networking events to teach/train people how to affectively connect and build life-long relationships, as opposed to short-transactional relationships. I’ve even authored a book, Connect and Grow Rich, out December 1, that is a how-to guide on growing wealth by connecting, both in person and online.

Check me out on facebook and let me know what you think of my story by posting a comment in the box below.

“It’s not what you know or who you know but who you will ask.” – Rob Coats
Getting help from people is one of the main reasons for establishing a large network but if you never take the time to tap into your network you will waste a heck of a lot of time.

For most people, asking for help isn’t an easy thing and it’s because in life usually at a very early age we’ve asked for something and were either scolded or hurt in a big way as a result and that experience has shaped our current reality. I’ve read that most people do things for 2 reasons in life: to avoid pain and/or to gain pleasure.  Most people would rather suffer than actually take the chance and get help to fix the problem. I will do my best at helping you over this hurdle in your life.

Most people don’t like asking for help when networking because it makes them feel vulnerable and they feel that they will either owe the person or the person will hold it over there head forever.

I recently read a blog post by Dr.Deb (a psychologist that specializes in trauma and depression) who was interviewed for The Tyra Banks Show on How To Ask For Help.

This is what she listed as being some of the most common myths that  hold people back from Asking today.

Myth: It makes us look vulnerable.

Truth: Asking for help creates an atmosphere of empowerment. It communicates to others that, while you may not have the answers, you are willing to find them and make things better.

Myth: Holding things in and keeping personal issues under wraps keeps us secure.

Lastly rember these 3 things when asking for help;
1. What type of help you need- Be specific. Let people know exactly what it is you want so they can know how to assist you.
2. Why you need it
3. When you need it

When you practice these simple truths you are much more likely to get help when asking then to not get it at all.

Please leave comments so I know that your alive.